Saturday, November 17, 2007

Sometimes I wish I was a lesbian

I figured that would get your attention. Now, in all honesty, I really like being a woman, and wouldn't really want to be the man in a relationship. But apart from that and the fact that I've yet to be attracted to females, sometimes I think it would be easier being a lesbian.

Take, for instance, the fact that I pick up women much more frequently than I do men. I keep meeting women who I click with immediately, who I have difficulty ending conversations with, and overall enjoy their company. Now, this is great when it comes to gaining more confidants, friends I trust enough to see the real me and whose opinions I trust and value. And if I was a lesbian, this would also generate potential partners to date. Unfortunately, as a heterosexual female, this is not one of the benefits.

I think the longer I go through my life, the more I understand the gender dynamics that are constantly at play. Perhaps my ability to click with women can be attributed to the fact that I don't see them as having potential and can therefore let down my guard more readily, but this only partially explains it. I mean, the feminist in me fights the notion that women and men are inherently different in their social skills and interactions, but societally imposed or not, there seems to be a dichotomy. Women (at least with each other) tend to be more open about their lives, confide in each other more regularly for advice or sympathy, bond by their conversations, and define their friendships based on their ability to trust the other person. On the other hand, men tend to hide their emotions more (from themselves and others), analyze less, bond over activities, and define their friendships based on their willingness/ability to have each other's back. Now, both have obvious strengths and weaknesses, and regardless of what gender fulfills what roles, you tend to need both skill sets covered.

My question to my readers, therefore, is this: Do I do a fair job at describing this dichotomy, and if so, is it more difficult to find opposites/complements to which you connect, or those that are like you?

3 comments:

DZ said...

I know I'm not exactly answering your question, but I came across this article and thought it was an interesting read.

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/chi-feminism_17nov17,1,1478938.story

DZ said...

Trying again with the link...

http://www.chicagotribune.com/news/nationworld/chi-feminism_17nov17,1,1478938.story

DZ said...

Third time's the charm