Wednesday, November 15, 2006

Stupid Girls

A friend sent me this music video- I absolutely love it! You might have already seen/heard it (it came out a while ago, but you know me and my knowledge of pop culture). Check it out if not:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7nr_-4MjYNU

The sad thing is how common it is. But hey, lemme know what you think about this one.

Tuesday, November 14, 2006

Politically Superficial

After the elections last week, I spent a good deal of time discussing with a variety of people the outcome. Now, I've long since realized that even though I disagree with those with the opposing political viewpoint, I recognize many have very logical arguments for why they believe what they believe. Take, for instance, homelessness. More liberal people may think some people in this situation are not responsible, and tend to look at increasing the number of jobs, minimum wage, low-income housing, and access to mental health drugs as means to lessen this problem. More conservative people may look to increase overall business success in hopes it affects the unemployed ( the "trickle down" theory of economics, I believe), and will look to fixing our distribution so that some homeless will stop abusing the system and take responsibility to get jobs for themselves. Now, you may agree with one camp or the other, but both sides would agree that homelessness is a problem.

Yet, last week, I ran into a handful of very educated people that would blatantly stereotype the opposite party. After pointing out that for the first time there would be a woman as Speaker of the House (something I thought would be less politically charged), one guy responded , "Yeah, but she's a commie". WHAT?? I didn't even know we still used that term in a derogatory sense.
After commenting that there would be the first Muslim congressman, he responded , "Yeah, he was a Black Panther." Well, I go on to find out that he's pretty moderate on his official stances about the Middle East, and endorsed by a few Jewish groups. Now common, did that guy even look into these people himself before blatantly stereotyping them? It seems more likely that he believed a one word description of them passed on by some biased media outlet, on the sole basis that they belonged to the Democratic party.

Don't think this only applies to the conservatives this election either. My sister was mad that people only voted against the Republicans when Iraq started to go sour and Bush couldn't weasel his way out of his lies anymore, and not because of all the human rights abuses against detainees in Guantanamo or the bias in the patriot act. People just didn't care about these things. I think one of the biggest reasons Dems lost in 2004 was because of this kind of liberal superiority complex, that writes most of the country off as being too ignorant to care about important social issues. Well, hell, last time we checked every adult in this country get the right to vole, and yes, people have different priorities for candidates. But just because someone cares more about having enough food to feed her family or takes a tough stance on national security doesn't mean she doesn't care about human rights violations. When you vote, however, you don't get to vote for someone with all of your beliefs, you have to prioritize and vote for someone who represents a lot of them.

I guess my point in all of this is that I'm terribly disappointed in others' ability to converse. To have a political discussion, without being angry at the other person for not agreeing with you. To have a strong political opinion, that's actually backed up with acknowledging the rationale behind multiple sides. I'm not saying we have to always agree on everything. What we do have to do, however, is listen. Because really, democracy runs the smoothest when politicians discuss viewpoints and have many different opinions involved in making a law. That's a whole lot better than the mudslinging campaigns we saw for this election and the usual back and forth political bantering after a law has been made. Then maybe individuals will stop mimicking these disgraceful attitudes outside the political arena as well.

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

On Dating Part II

Here you have it, the much awaited for sequel to the dating rant.... :) Btw, all those who read without commenting SUCK! I like knowing what you all think.

Anyways...

Last time around, I never quite answered the question I posed. What is the point in dating? I've been pondering this a lot since I got to Atlanta, because no one ever really has a good answer. I think it's because everyone has different reasons. Here are the three main breakdowns I see:

1) I'll call this high school dating. You date because you like the company, the physical attraction, the chemistry. You're still trying what's out there, and trying to figure out what the heck you want. You like to date, and if someone suits your fancy, why not?

2) I'll call this the religious and over 30 dating. You date because you want a spouse. You try to give everyone a real chance, but call it quits once they're not in it for the long haul or when you realize you couldn't deal with being married to that person. When you're not dating, you feel you're wasting time.

3) I'll call this the picky category. You've dated a bit, and have some idea of what you're looking for (and more of an idea of what you're not). You're not ready to get married anytime in the near future, but you don't much see the point in dating anyone long-term that doesn't have the potential to be that person later on. Other people usually tend to be more concerned with you being single than you are.

In case you can't already tell, I figure I'm in this third category. I mean, I do like the company and all that other good stuff. But I'm still stubbornly independent, and have a tough time ceding much of my time and interests for another, especially someone I'm just lightly dating. I mean, I loved my last relationship where I never saw my boyfriend before 11 on Thurs-Sat nights, think of all the time I had for my girls! :) Besides, it seems to me that you can satisfy any need for companionship with good friends, and as a female, there are always a number of options to satisfy the physical if necessary. As for the 2nd category, I'm not at a place in my life where I could handle losing some of my independence, not always following my dreams, and acting in the best interest of the couple instead of the individual. Which, well, you need to be willing to do to have a functional marriage. And so I keep trucking along as the picky dater, knowing what I want (or rather, what I don't) and ruling out many before I even go on a date.

The thing I don't get about category 3 is the way your friends in serious couples react. "So, are you dating anyone interesting?"... "No, well, don't worry, you'll find him"..."Maybe we can set you up with this friend..." I mean, really, I didn't realize I was worried or needing help. But thanks for feeling sorry for me.

Sunday, November 05, 2006

On Dating Part I

What is the point of dating? After a year an a half sort of in the real world, I still haven't figured this one out. To tell the truth, I still tend to run in the other direction everytime a guy asks for my number, regardless of how cute he is. Maybe it's just me, but I want to revert back to high school and undergrad dating (undergrad only in the sense of actually liking the person, as opposed to the random hookups that happened a lot more frequently). You know, where you really liked a guy and he liked you, and that tension constantly built up until the time you first kissed. I liked the butterfly feeling you'd get before anything happened. And I really like that the majority of these first kisses went with the flow of the moment and were rather memorable.

Now outside in the "real world", you're actually supposed to date. I mean, after the first time or two of meeting a complete stranger, you're supposed to go on a date. Maybe you have a little of the butterflies, but they're just starting to form. And chances are, the only thing you know is that you have potential chemistry. You don't actually KNOW the person. If the date goes well, you might get a kiss, and depending on the person, maybe more. HOW DOES THIS MAKE ANY SENSE??

To make matters more complicated, there's dating rules and games that everyone seems to understand. How and when do you say you're not interested? Who should call who and when? What is actually a date?.... I think maybe this is why I have such issues with it- I don't know how to play. I can pretend for a little, but sooner or later I'm bound to screw up. Take for instance, the first kiss. One of the last guys I "dated" went to kiss me, and I literally turned the other cheek. Not for lack of wanting to, I just didn't know what signs to read to realize he was about to (that and the fact that he didn't exactly have the smoothest initiation moves ;) ). In "real world dating", there's almost an expected time for a first kiss, which only serves to make that time period more awkward. And if you're like me and try to avoid all potentially awkward situations, well, then, you're just screwed (and not in a good way).

Wednesday, November 01, 2006

Ethics and honor

Where does everyone get the moral yardstick they try to measure up to? After a recent conversation with a friend, I found out that he had no moral compunction with reusing old papers, copying someone's work, anything to simplify the assignment... as long as he didn't get caught. Now, I'm not sure how many people will actually admit to it, but somehow I doubt he's the only one that feels that way. I know at Duke, for one, there was no lack of students who were willing to do whatever was necessary to get the grades they wanted. Fraternity and sorority test and homework files, literally copying engineering code, and of course the peering over someone's shoulder during an exam, for such an academically respected school, we had it all. After all, most reasoned, this is what the real world entails.

I'll be the first to admit it. I've cheated before. On an AP government quiz in high school one day, I memorized the multiple choice answers. Everyone else was doing it, it was one of our teacher's many pointless quizzes, and I caved. But TO THIS DAY, that memory still bothers me. I can't imagine how I would handle more major offenses, let alone trying to justify them. It just doesn't feel right, like I'm not being true to myself and my values, if I put forth something that's not my own work or effort. Really, what's the point of your word if it can't be trusted?

Maybe people just don't have high ethical boundaries for themselves. I mean, look at this study about teachers cheating. If our own educators can't themselves behave morally, how can they teach our children to care? Copyright infringements, rampant plagiarism, forging timecards, bosses taking credit for their people's ideas... yes, it's prevalent in the real world, but does that really make it right?

In today's exceedingly competitive world, why do very few people care about ethics? I mean really, who sticks to moral guidelines if it will cost them an extra few hours of their time?